Choosing Faith Over Control: Trusting God When Letting Go Feels Risky
- Erin Schwab
- 1 day ago
- 4 min read
Living as God’s Beloved – #17 in the Identity Series
There are moments when trusting God feels far more vulnerable than staying in control.
Control feels responsible. Predictable. Wise.
Trust, on the other hand, can feel risky — especially when outcomes matter deeply and the stakes feel high.
Many of us learned early on that staying in control meant staying safe. But beneath that habit often lives an orphan belief: If I don’t manage this, everything could fall apart.
Why Trusting God vs Control Feels Risky
When life feels uncertain, control promises relief. It offers the illusion of safety — something tangible to hold onto when clarity is missing.
But control doesn’t actually produce peace. It produces pressure.
Over time, it leaves us vigilant, tense, and exhausted — carrying responsibility God never intended us to bear.
Living as God’s beloved doesn’t mean we stop caring. It means we stop believing everything depends on us.
Control Is Often a Response to Fear
Most of us don’t cling to control because we’re power-hungry. We cling because we’re afraid — of failing, of being hurt, of disappointing God or others.
That fear often shows up in two very different, but equally exhausting ways.
When Control Looks Like “Doing It Right”
For some of us, uncertainty triggers a deep drive to do everything correctly.
We respond by tightening our grip on responsibility, discipline, and self-control. We tell ourselves:
If I do this the right way, things will work out.
If something goes wrong, it must mean I missed something.
God will come through if I stay faithful enough.
Without realizing it, trust subtly shifts into performance. Obedience becomes pressure. Faith turns into self-reliance.
But God never asked us to be perfect managers of righteousness. He invited us to be dependent children.
When identity rests on being “good enough,” control feels necessary. When identity rests in God’s love, surrender becomes possible.
When Control Looks Like Staying Alert and Prepared
For others, uncertainty triggers vigilance rather than perfectionism.
We stay alert.We scan for potential problems.We prepare for worst-case scenarios.
Our thoughts sound like:
I need to be ready for what might go wrong.
If I anticipate danger, I can stay safe.
I can’t relax until I know how this will turn out.
This kind of watchfulness can feel wise — even faithful — but over time it steals peace. Trust becomes fragile. Rest feels irresponsible. God’s guidance gets crowded out by anxious planning.
Yet Scripture reminds us:
“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in You.”— Isaiah 26:3
God does not ask us to predict the future.He asks us to walk with Him into it.
What Control Produces vs. What Trust Produces
Control produces:
Anxiety
Pressure
Self-reliance
Fear of failure
Exhaustion
Trust produces:
Peace
Humility
Dependence on God
Freedom from outcomes
Rest for the soul
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.”— Proverbs 3:5
Trust doesn’t mean passivity. It means choosing obedience without demanding certainty.
How Beloved Identity Changes Everything
When we live as God’s beloved, both control strategies begin to loosen.
We no longer need to:
Earn God’s approval by getting everything right
Stay hyper-vigilant to ensure our safety
Carry responsibility God never assigned us
Instead, we learn to trust that:
God’s love remains secure even when we fail
God is present even when outcomes are unclear
God is faithful even when fear is loud
Beloved identity replaces:
Perfectionism with grace
Anxiety with trust
Self-reliance with surrender
A Real-Life Moment of Release
I once noticed how quickly I tried to manage a situation God had clearly asked me to release. My intentions were good — but my grip was tight. I thought control was wisdom.
Peace didn’t return until I loosened my hold and chose trust instead.
Circumstances didn’t immediately change —but I did.
That’s often how God works. He reshapes the heart before He shifts the situation.
Reflection Questions
Take a moment to consider:
Where do I feel pressure to “get it right” instead of trusting God’s grace?
Where am I staying alert out of fear rather than resting in God’s care?
What is one small area God may be inviting me to release today?
Closing Encouragement
Trust grows not through certainty — but through surrender.
And surrender is always safest in the hands of a good Father.
You are not an orphan scrambling to manage outcomes. You are a beloved child learning to trust.
An Invitation to Walk This Journey Together
If trusting God feels hard — or if control has quietly taken over more than you’d like to admit — you don’t have to work through it alone.
Through gospel-centered coaching, I come alongside women who long to move from striving to rest, from fear to trust, and from self-reliance to confident dependence on God. Together, we create space to listen, discern, and learn how to live more fully from your identity as God’s beloved.
If you’re ready to take the next step, I’d be honored to walk with you.
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